I went to bed with a structured game plan for today. I woke up & none of it happened…. ok, actually I completed one task on my long to-do list.
Should I feel guilty? Guilt is my usual MO! This emotion is all too common. Good news, though! Today is the least guilty I’ve felt in a long time. I typically beat myself up if I’m not working when my husband is working, or if I don’t accomplish a huge list of tasks each day. Are you the same?
I think we are hard-wired to feel the need to work ourselves to the bone in order to reward ourselves with a night out, dinner with friends or a day of shopping.
Well, I did just that!
Nooooo, not feel guilty! A day of shopping!
I enjoyed a day meandering in & out of shops without a care for time or work that I should be doing. Only now, am I feeling a slight tinge of guilt, but I realize, I have to just let it go & quit beating myself up over every little thing.
Most days are accomplished through pure adrenaline. We find it very challenging to fully focus on one task at hand. We get sucked into all the daily distractions & frantically multi-task until we collapse on the couch late night. I basically call this scattered energy. Our days are long, non-stop, quite chaotic & feel like we are always on a time crunch which leads to very little time for relaxation & reflection. This is why today was truly blissful!
We definitely recognize that we need to be more mindful & fully engage. We need to better direct our attention to whatever we’re doing at that moment. We need to have greater awareness while completing a job & not just go through the physical motions ONLY for the sake of ticking a task off the “to-do” list. Do you feel like you are running around with little focus?
After some shopping, I paused & enjoyed quiet time. I actually just sat & people watched.
What I saw & thoughts I was having on a bench while waiting for my train:
Where are all these people going? What do they do? Did this guy just get off work? Who’s she talking to on the phone? Couple dressed up …. must be date night. Just found out the girl next to me thinks her friend is mad at her…. Lots of shopping bags; do they give to the homeless? A young, black girl with a huge ALDO bag. She has a smirk on her face…. what is she thinking? Ohhhhh, she’s proud of herself & new purchase (she just pulled this huge tote out of her bag). She literally can’t stop smiling; she is just beside herself with joy… cute bag though. What does she do for work? Does she go to school? Why is she taking a photo of her bag in the train station? Did she post it on IG? Share it with her friends? That coffee smells amazing, there goes the blender again. Maybe I should try this place, treats look tasty. Just realized my arches are aching…. serves me right for forgetting my inserts. Why do you walk around without your pants up? I don’t get that, how can you walk with your pants UNDER your ass…. Pull your freaking pants up!!!!!! Oh WOW! The blind lady from Salem …. what the heck is she doing in the city by herself, what guts! Maybe I should help her up the stairs once we get to Salem. Holy crap, old guy just walked by, reeks of urine, I feel bad for him. Is he ok? Interesting look…. is that the “We Want You” Hat?!?! He seems chirpy, friendly actually, but the smell…. They’re loud & rowdy, makes me nervous…. This plus a ton more random thoughts & people watching until I boarded my train.
THIS WAS A GOOD DAY!
Photos from previous, words are from today.
- Top: Michael Kors from Macy’s (showcased in a previous post)
- Pants: Zara
- Heels: Sigerson Morrison from The Outnet
- Dark & Stormy Clutch: Kent Stetson
Thanks so much for having a little read. Hope you liked!